* * *

"Oh, Quatre. You've been a naughty boy."


Those words, spoken with such intensity made Quatre shiver. As Wufei neared him, that shivering turned to flat out quaking. The Arabian knew Wufei was going to kill him. Literally. The only question was, how long was the Chinese boy going to draw out the torture? From the deadly gleam in his eyes, it looked like it would be a long time. Wufei perched on the bed, next to Quatre. The black haired boy's muscles were rigid with anger.


The only thought in his mind was to beat the blonde into unconsciousness, then strangle the remaining life out of him. Wufei hands itched to make contact with that creamy flesh. But he was denied, due the fact that the other two pilots were still in the house. But his rage continued to blossom in him, until it encompassed his entire being. Quatre could only lay there watching, and waiting for Wufei to attack. He knew he had an ounce of safety, with the others around, but that didn't comfort him. Because Quatre knew Wufei would extract his punishment. If not now, then sometime in the near future. And the blonde would rather be disciplined now, then have to live every second filled with dread, not knowing when the black haired boy would strike.


Wufei managed to get his fury under control. At least now he could move his hands, without the worry that they would latch onto Quatre's neck.  Wufei looked down at Quatre's trembling form, and Quatre could feel the fire from those black eyes burning into him. The Arabian wished that Trowa would come back, and save him from this. But, Trowa had no idea as to Wufei true personality. How could he?  And Quatre knew hoping was pointless. The green eyed boy might have been able to save his body from further damage. But his soul was ravaged beyond salvation. And without that, what did it matter what happened to his body?


So, Quatre relinquished himself to whatever Wufei had planned for him. It wasn't really significant anymore. Without a soul his life held no value. He was just a live shell. And he didn't care anymore what happened to him. The only reason he clung to sanity was to prevent Wufei from moving on to someone else. And he felt a bizarre wave of calmness wash over him. At least by subjecting himself to this, he spared the others. Quatre knew he could never be whole again, but there was a certain peace in knowing that he was protecting them. It at least gave purpose to his sufferings.


Quatre realized he was most likely descending into madness. How else could he explain his placid behavior at a time like this? But seeing Trowa so open, so trusting, had renewed his sense of duty. He would surrender to Wufei, to save the others. And suddenly he wasn't scared anymore. He wasn't planning on standing up to Wufei, quite the opposite actually. He would submit what shreds were left of his body to the boy. And with this intention, Quatre felt his existence held some function. He didn't feel any less hollow, but it somehow made the abuse he was going to suffer bearable.


Wufei saw the anxiety seep from Quatre's eyes. It was replaced by something he could only describe as...serenity? Wufei knew that either Quatre had accepted his fate, or had gone completely insane. And he didn't care either way. It pleased him. Some of his tension drained away. It was replaced by a feeling of immense pride. To know that he had changed the blonde from a loving, caring individual, to an ashamed, frightened wreck, to an emotionless shell, and now to this. Quatre was fully his. No fighting, no protests, just pure ownership. The power he felt surged through his veins.


It would be so much fun to beat the blonde later, and see if he could force some of that tranquility from his expression. To hit him until he destroyed his body, like he had destroyed his soul. But first things, first. He had to get rid of Barton and Yuy. But he had an idea. "Don't move," he told Quatre, "not an inch. Stay right there until I give you permission to do otherwise."


Quatre nodded his head impassively. Wufei got out his laptop, and set his plan into motion. He set it up, and hacked into Heero's system. It was far too easy for him. Yuy was getting sloppy.


Few realized just how intelligent Wufei was. Before becoming a Gundam pilot, he had been quite a scholar. But the others overlooked that. All they viewed him as was a boy who screamed for justice, and who seemed to have a certain distaste for women. Well, the hate of women was true enough. It all started with that bitch Meiran. Wufei could feel his anger renewing at the thought of her. She had always been trying to out do him. Trying to prove she was so strong, and such a warrior. But he had shown her.


He recalled the day she had challenged him to a fight. Saying she, a lowly woman, could show him how to fight for justice. Wufei had quickly proven to her exactly who ruled this relationship. After he kicked her to the ground, he stood and watched as she struggled to get up, tears streaming down her face. It was the first time Wufei had felt any sort of lust for her. To see her groveling before him, taken down by him, was highly erotic. He had raped her right there, in that field of flowers she loved so much. She screamed at him, tried to beat him off, but to no avail. Wufei had been in complete control, and enjoyed every second.


It was then that he realized that he truly found pleasure in the degradation of others. And that had been the most gratifying experience in his life. Wufei thought Meiran had learned her lesson, that she would realize her weakness and submit to him. But no, that traitorous bitch had run off to try and fight OZ. He had gone after her, not because he had any cares about her well being. But because he had no other choice. She had made him look like a coward, or worse. He had to save face. That, and he had an abundance of punishments he wanted her to suffer.


He wasn't ready to lose his little slave, not yet. He had so many plans for her. Then the whore had gotten herself nearly killed in battle. But she might have survived, if not for Wufei. He had taken her back to her precious field, and proceeded to rape her again, painfully and roughly. Showing her the error of her ways. Once he was done, Meiran crawled away, and screamed that he was the weak one. Preying on those who were less strong them himself. Wufei had succumbed to the rage inside of him. He picked up a nearby rock and began to beat her over the head with it. Only when her skull caved, and her blood ran freely did he stop.


The injuries could have been caused by the damage to her mobile suit, but Wufei didn't want to risk questions. So he played the mourning husband, and jumped at the chance to pilot, and escape the colony. He nicknamed his Mobile Suit Nataku, not as a memorial to his wife, but as a testimonial to his authority. He had the might to crush a life with his bare hands. So The Gundam's name, Nataku, stood as a trophy to his power.


Wufei looked over his shoulder. Quatre hadn't stirred. The blonde was quietly laying in the bed. Wufei felt his own power filling him. Finally someone had bent under his will. Oh, Quatre had fucked up, and he would pay. But that would be just for the fun of it. Wufei knew the Arabian had finally submitted to his complete control. Wufei had been unsuccessful with both Meiran and Duo. But Quatre would be his salvation. The Chinese boy had finally won. Now the ultimate pleasure could begin. But first he had to lose Barton and Yuy.


Wufei's fingers flew over the keys. In no time at all, he had composed a very authentic replica of a mission notice. He knew Trowa would hesitate to let Heero go, but no one could stand between Heero and his missions. Well, except that slut, Duo Maxwell. But he wasn't here to interfere anymore was he? Wufei felt his glory dwindle some. He had failed with Maxwell. He remembered opening the door to their room that night and seeing his Duo and Heero Yuy naked and curled together. The anger he felt towards Meiran was nothing compared to what he felt at seeing that. But in the end Duo had joined her, and Wufei had virtually killed Heero in the process. Although, Heero was never aware that Wufei was involved.


He finished typing and sent the message. The scheme was initiated, now all he had to do was wait. He shut down the computer, and stowed it away. He turned to Quatre. "Stay," Wufei commanded. Quatre nodded. Wufei strode over to him, and captured his mouth in a searing kiss. He continued until Quatre was lightheaded. Then the Chinese boy drew back, and searched that pale face.


"Was that better than Barton?" he asked in a harsh whisper.


"Yes."


Quatre knew it was a lie. Nothing could equal Trowa's soft, loving lips. But if it would appease Wufei, and save the others, Quatre wouldn't waver. Wufei wanted to crow aloud. But considering the circumstances he settled for a gloating whisper.


"I knew it. That scrawny statue can't compare to me. Right?"


"Yes, Trowa could never be you."


"And who do you love? Who do you belong to?" Wufei questioned.


"You, Wufei. Only you."


"That's right. Forever."


The last word was not a threat. It was more of a promise, a fact. A covenant Quatre knew Wufei would keep. The only way to escape would be through death. Then Wufei left, leaving Quatre to ponder.

* * *

Trowa drifted down the hallway. He would check on Heero, then make something for everyone to eat. Quatre was looking way too thin. And he was light as a feather. The green eyed boy smiled wistfully at the recollection of having Quatre in his arms. As soon as they could be alone, he intended to savor that feeling again. He entered the living room, pleased to see Heero was still slumbering. Trowa tucked the blanket around him, and left quietly, so as not to wake him.


The tall boy rummaged through the kitchen, but found absolutely no food. And no signs that there had been any there recently. What had Quatre and Wufei been eating? He decided he'd check his computer for any new messages, and then go rouse Quatre, and see if the blonde wanted to travel to town, and get supplies. Trowa's lips broke into another smile. He couldn't stop them. For once, he felt that everything was finally going well in his life. If he had been prone to skipping, he would have. But that was more Quatre's style.


The blonde boy just seemed to walk with an energetic bounce.  Well, usually. But ever since they had arrived he seemed almost lethargic. In fact, Trowa had been surprised that Quatre had returned his affections this morning. He was amazed that the gentle little blonde would return his feelings. Especially since Quatre had been avoiding him since his arrival. //Why is he acting so bizarre? First he hardly notices we're in the same room. Then he runs from me like he's scared. Then he tells me to leave him alone. But when we wake up this morning, he responds to my kiss. His actions are so contradictory. They just don't make sense. I'm sure that he cares for me. This morning proves that he at least has some feelings toward me. But that doesn't explain they way he was acting before.//


Trowa decided that later on he and Quatre would sit down, and have a long talk. They would sort out whatever was bothering his love.  Heero's laptop started beeping urgently. Trowa glared at the evil machine, and seriously considered just putting a few bullets in it.  He saw Heero had already logged on, and was scanning whatever he had received. Heero had seen Trowa when he first woke up. He knew the boy was daydreaming, he had this peaceful smile on his face. Heero took that as a good sign. Trowa waited patiently for Heero to fill him in on the information.


Wufei came into the room, breaking the silence."I've got a mission," Wufei said, "I probably won't be back for two days or so."


"When do you leave?" Heero asked, not looking up.


"In about an hour. I think I'll check on Nataku, make sure it's fully repaired before I go."


Trowa was watching Wufei as he spoke. The black haired boy seemed tense. It was most likely due to having missions back to back. But Trowa wondered if it was him. He knew Heero was okay with him and Quatre being together, but he had no idea how Wufei felt. //I never even thought of Wufei. Maybe he's uncomfortable with it.// Trowa couldn't decide if now was the right time to broach the subject. //I guess I might as well. Maybe it'll relieve some of his nervousness. I wouldn't want it to affect his performance. Being distracted will get you killed.//


"Wufei? May I speak to you?"


Wufei looked shocked that Trowa had spoken. But he nodded in consent, and Trowa motioned toward the dining room. The pair headed in and stood facing eachother. Trowa wasn't sure where to start, but he figured the was no point in being shy about it.


"I know you were startled to walk in on Quatre and I this morning. But I meant what I said to him, and I thought you should know. If it bothers you, then I'm sorry, but we can't change the way we feel."


"So, Quatre feels the same?" Wufei asked. He knew he was playing with fire, but he couldn't stop himself. He had never seen Trowa so open. And it fascinated him. Oh, yes, as soon as he was done with Quatre, Wufei definitely had plans in store for Trowa. Breaking the banged boy would be paradise. Maybe Wufei would keep Quatre around for a while. Let the blonde see what was happening to his beloved. He forced himself to focus, as Trowa spoke.


"I-I'm pretty sure he does. I mean..we've never.. And last night we didn't.. but I think, no, I know he does." //Oh, God. I hope he does. Please, please let him feel the same.//


"Well, then, I wish you luck" //You're going to need it.// Wufei said, "and I hope you are very happy together. //You don't have a chance. He already belongs to me.// Wufei appeared to be sincere, but his words had almost a malicious undertone to them. Trowa told himself he was imagining things.


"Thank you for the support Wufei."


Wufei bowed slightly and left. All the way to his Gundam he laughed about Trowa's gullibility. The boy actually trusted him. That would make breaking him that much better. The laughter died away, as his thoughts turned to lust. He wanted Trowa's body writhing beneath him. He wanted to see that solitary green eye filled with pain and shame. Maybe he would tie Trowa down, and force him to watch while he raped Quatre. Or maybe he could force Trowa to rape Quatre. That would be an interesting scenario. The blonde's eye's vacant, as Trowa pounded into him. That green orb full of shame, and self hate. Yes, that was what Wufei wanted. Now all he had to do was figure out how to make it happen. An hour later as he took off, he was still planning on how to make his fantasy come to life.

* * *

Trowa thought he would feel better after his talk with Wufei, but he didn't. He felt unsettled. Like Wufei was toying with him. But he told himself it wasn't Wufei, it was his doubts about Quatre's feelings. He joined Heero in the living room. The Japanese boy typed something, then he shut his laptop, and looked at Trowa. "Mission."


Trowa raised an eyebrow, and shook his head. "Not in your condition."


Heero sighed, annoyed, and not really in the mood to fight. "A mission is a mission. I've gone with injuries more severe than this."


Trowa couldn't argue with that. Heero had completed assignments with broken bones, and ribs, head wounds, gun shots, and a plethora of other painful things. The tall pilot looked at his friend and knew Heero would go no matter what he said. He sighed knowing it was useless to argue. He nodded in defeat. "So, when do you leave?" he asked.


"We."


Trowa looked at him, confused.


"We have a mission together, and we leave in two hours," Heero stated.


Trowa *almost* masked the disappointment on his face, but not before Heero caught a glimpse. The Japanese boy hid his smile. Trowa obviously wanted to spend time with Quatre. He sincerely hoped things worked out between them. He had thought that seeing the two of them together would hurt, but it didn't. It made him think of Duo, but in a good way. The things they could have had. It made Heero's heart ache, but at the same time filled it with joy. His friends would get the chance that he didn't. He'd had his taste of love, he'd just have to savor it for a lifetime.


Since Quatre hadn't left the bedroom yet, Trowa went to check up on him. He found the blonde laying exactly where had been. Trowa smiled at him. "Hey lazy. Get up. Or maybe you'd like it better if I joined you," he teased.


"No, Trowa. I'm not feeling well. I think I'm coming down with something."


Trowa's voice went from teasing, to concerned. "What's the matter? Do you need anything?"


Quatre shook his head. "No, just rest. I think that would be best."


"Oh, ok. that's probably best. Heero and I have a mission, we leave in two hours. And Wufei's already gone. Will you be all right by yourself?"


Quatre nodded feebly."I'll just sleep until you get back."


Trowa walked over and knelt by the bedside."I'll check on you before I go."


Then he brushed Quatre's bangs off his forehead. Admiring how silky it felt under his fingers. He leaned over and kissed Quatre's forehead. Then he got up, and headed for the door. He stopped just before exiting, and turned to face his love. "Call me if you need anything. "Then Trowa quietly shut the door, and went to find Heero. They needed to discuss the mission before they left.


In the bedroom Quatre was being torn apart. "Yes, Trowa I need you! Please help me, fix me, love me! Take all the pain away, make me whole again! Don't leave me! Please don't leave me!" he screamed.


But Trowa heard none of it, for Quatre never spoke the words aloud. Nor, would he ever. He would protect Trowa, no matter the cost. Besides, the consequences of opening up were too overwhelming. Either Trowa would still care for him, and try to help, or he would know what Quatre had become, and hate him. Personally Quatre thought Trowa would do the second. And he didn't blame Trowa. Quatre was disgusted by what he had turned into. He knew he was less than worthy of Trowa's purity. He was, after all, only Wufei's fuck toy.


Not even a person anymore, merely an outlet for sex, and a frame for beatings. But Quatre knew that even if Trowa did offer help, he wouldn't take it. He was too far gone now, to be restored. And he didn't want to see the pain in Trowa's eyes as he realized Quatre was already dead. His body was alive, but he wasn't really living. He wanted to spare Trowa that suffering. As long as Trowa was safe then Quatre could bear anything. Even the green eyed boy's hate. And Trowa would eventually forget him, and find love in someone worthy of his affections. Quatre would sacrifice anything to keep Trowa unharmed, and give him a chance at happiness. He would offer up his own life willingly, to grant him that chance.


Trowa and Heero sat at the dining room table discussing battle tactics. Once they figured out their strategy Heero feigned sleepiness, and claimed he was going to rest before they left. Trowa knew he was just giving him the opportunity to spend some quiet time with Quatre. He silently thanked him, and went to the bedroom to see how Quatre was feeling. He pushed open the door slowly, so as not to disturb him. The sight on the bed tugged at his heart.


Quatre had kicked all the covers off and was curled into a ball. He smiled, and pulled the covers back over him. Trowa brushed his hand across Quatre's cheek. It amazed him that someone who strong enough to fight armies of Mobile Dolls, could feel so soft under his fingers. Trowa leaned over, and placed a light kiss to that cheek. How could one person make him feel this way? He had worked so hard to keep his emotions under control, to restrain himself. And yet this slip of a boy had broken through all that.


But he wasn't just any boy, he was Quatre. He was special. Trowa planted kisses down that cheek, until he reached those supple lips. He touched his lips to them fleetingly. And then again, only this time with a hint more pressure. Quatre's arms wrapped themselves around his neck, pulling him closer. And the blonde's mouth opened, beckoning him in. Trowa accepted the invitation, and let his tongue explore Quatre's moist mouth.


Trowa pulled the blanket from between them. He laid himself on top of his love, never stopping the exploration of his inner crevice. Quatre's legs parted and wound themselves around his waist. Trowa thought he was in heaven. He could feel his erection already straining against the front of his pants, and he could feel Quatre's too. The brown haired boy rocked against the blonde, rubbing their fabric clad arousal's together. Not getting a reaction, he broke the kiss, and leaned to speak in Quatre's ear.


"Oh, Quatre. I love you so much. Will you let me show you?"


Quatre's eyes flew open, and he gasped. "Trowa?"


Trowa thought Quatre was being coy, and playing with him. But one look at those horror filled blue green orbs, and he knew this was no joke. Trowa climbed off him, and sat on the end of the bed. "Who else would it be?"


Quatre's eyes filled with guilt, the sins he could no longer hide. Even though he and Trowa had never had a relationship, every time Wufei took him Quatre felt like he was cheating. And now here was Trowa asking him the one question that could save them, or damn them both.


But Quatre couldn't tell him. For telling Trowa who he had thought he was, would mean telling Trowa why he though that. That meant he'd have to say everything. And he couldn't. He didn't want Trowa to know. Quatre knew he deserved everything that happened to him. And now he knew he even deserved Trowa's hatred. But it was better this way. Trowa would be safe, this way.


"Who else would it be, Quatre?"


"I.. I.."


Quatre had no answer. He had seen those beautiful green eyes, so honest, so unblighted, and he couldn't look into them and lie. Trowa reached out and embraced his upper arms. But Quatre wouldn't look him in the eye. He looked up, down, to the side. Any where but the guileless green orbs. He tried not to wince as Trowa's fingers touched his abused flesh. Trowa let one arm free, and used his hand to make Quatre meet his eyes.


"Who else would it be?"


"I... I... it..." Those eyes were tearing into him, and he couldn't think.


Then Trowa released him, and hung his head. "Quatre. If there is someone else, please just tell me. I love you with all my heart. For me than can be no other besides you. But if you don't return that, then please do me the decency of telling me. Just be honest, I couldn't take it if you lied. Please," he asked hoarsely.


He looked up and Quatre saw tears welling in those green depths. Trowa was crying and it was all his fault. His tribulations had been for nothing. In the end, he had been the one to hurt Trowa.


"Trowa. I do l-l-love y-you. I've always loved you. Only you. Please believe me. It's always been you. It always will be."


Trowa stared at him, tears sliding down his face. "You do?" he whispered.


"Yes. And I always will. You be always be my one true love."


Trowa reached out, and pulled Quatre into his arms. Quatre put his arms around Trowa's neck, and memorized energy nuance of the tall boy. The way his arms felt, how it felt to be enfolded in them. It was the little memory he would cherish to himself that would see him through the fates Wufei had in store. All too soon Quatre pulled away. Trowa tried to drag him back, but Quatre refused.


"I need to tell you something."


"Anything," Trowa breathed.


Quatre steeled himself. This was going to be the hardest thing he had ever done. But he was doing it for Trowa. Everything he did he did out of love for Trowa. And even though the boy might grow to hate him, he would never regret what he had done. He regretted the loss of his innocence, they way he looked at the world as good, as well as his virginity. He regretted losing his heart, his soul, that love that he used to have, feelings, emotions, hope. All that he regretted.


But never once did he regret his choice to sacrifice himself in Trowa's place. He would do it again in a heartbeat." Trowa, I can't be with you. A relationship is impossible between us. It can never be. I won't allow it. And, I don't think we should ever see eachother again. It's just too hard."


Trowa swore he could hear the sound of his heart breaking. His Quatre loved him, but he never wanted to see him again? //Please let this be some nightmare.// "Quatre, why are you saying this? If you love me why can't we be together? Whatever I've done, I'm sorry I'll fix it, but please don't leave me."


Quatre would have rather killed himself, then do this to Trowa. But it was the only way. "It's not anything you did. It's just not meant to be. I'm sorry."


Trowa leaped at him, and pulled him into an embrace. "No, Quatre I love you. I'm not letting go."


Quatre squirmed free. He stared at the bed, and forced his voice to be harsh. "No. Trowa. I think you should leave. I never want to see you again." Quatre looked up, and was confronted by Trowa's tear filled eyes.


"please," Trowa whispered, "I love you."


Quatre braced himself. "Get out. Now."


Trowa stood and drug himself to the door. He turned and caught Quatre's eyes."I'll always love only you. Forever. Even if you hate me, I won't stop. If you asked me to, I would die for you. Because without you, my life has no meaning."


Then he left, and Quatre collapsed onto the bed. //I know you would Trowa. I know you would take my place. But I love you, so I took yours.//


Trowa ran down the hallway, and out the front door, slamming it behind him. The noise woke Heero, who hobbled over to see what the commotion was. By the time he got to the door, Trowa was long gone, Heero didn't even see him. He headed to the bedroom to find out what had happened. He found Quatre sitting on the bed, eyes glassed over.


"Quatre?" he asked. No response. "Quatre?" he called louder.


Quatre turned his vacant eyes toward Heero.


"Quatre, what the hell happened?"


"Trowa..," he whispered.


"What happened to Trowa?" Heero commanded.


"Heero?"


Heero was getting frustrated. "Yes, it's Heero. Where's Trowa?"


Quatre grasped Heero's hand. And he turned cloudy eyes to meet the clear Prussian ones. "Take care of Trowa for me."


"Why can't you take care of Trowa? Tell me what happened!"


"I told Trowa that we can't be together."


Heero gasped. //I thought they were getting along so well. What's going on?// "Why? You don't feel the same about him?" Heero asked.


"No, I told him I love him. But it can never be."


Quatre was saying all this calmly, like they were discussing weather, not a person's heart. Heero was enraged. He thought the blonde was playing with Trowa's emotions. He jerked his hand free.


"So, what, Quatre? This was all a game to you? You think what you did to Trowa was excusable? Well, it's not."


"I do love him Heero. I always will. You just couldn't understand."


"I can't understand what? That you're selfish, using his feelings like that. He really loves you, and you threw that away. Well, I hope you're happy. Because I will never forgive you." Quatre was taken aback at the vehemence of Heero's words. But Heero paid him no heed, he just kept going. "I would give anything to see Duo one more time. Hold him in my arms, touch his face, his hair. I would tell him I loved him a million times in a row."


Hearing Duo's name Quatre flinched as if he had been struck.


<<

Quatre saw Duo's face. It was covered with blood, just like his clothes. In fact there seemed to be blood everywhere. And he saw the gun, and he screamed. God. No. Duo!! Stop!! And then Duo had looked at him, violet eyes filled with pain. And he locked eyes with Quatre.


"Take care of Heero for me Quatre. I love him you know," Duo said.


Then the gun fired, and Duo slumped to the ground. Quatre ran screaming to his side, tears running down his face.

>>


"--And you. You get that chance, and you act like this. You don't deserve him then."


"I know," Quatre said sadly, "I know."


And Heero felt that maybe Quatre really did know. Maybe he was judging this the wrong way. "Quatre," he said gently, "why can't you be together?"


"I have to protect him. It's the only way. Please watch over him," he pleaded.


Heero nodded. Then Quatre went back to being in his private reverie, and Heero took the hint and left the room.


Heero was confused. He had thought that Quatre really loved Trowa, and apparently he did. But what the hell was with all the evasive answers? He'd have to find Trowa, and straighten this out. He grumbled to himself. Relationship counseling was not in his training. But he would do anything for the welfare of his friends. He wandered outside to begin his search for Trowa. Heero found a huge, thick stick on the ground. He picked it up, and used it for a cane. It helped relieve some of the weight on his injured leg. He headed into the forest hoping he could repair this.


Trowa ran blindly through the woods. Tears stung his eyes, but he welcomed the pain. Physical pain was better than the aching in his chest. His Quatre didn't want him. He never wanted to see him again. Trowa would never touch that beautiful sun kissed hair, or see that heart melting smile, or hear that sweet pitched voice, or look into those deep blue green eyes. He would never see his Quatre again.


He truly loved Quatre and there for would honor his wish. If Quatre didn't want to see him then Trowa would stay away. And he knew it would kill him. But as promised Trowa would die for Quatre, and if this is how Quatre chose for him to go, then so be it. He ran into the clearing concealing the Mechas. He climbed into Heavyarms, and took off. His vision was obscured by his tears, but he didn't care. All he had ever cared about was Quatre.


Heero was limping through the trees when he heard the sound of one of the Gundams lifting off. By the time he got to the clearing Trowa was gone. He knew the other boy was heading off to do the mission alone. He struggled into Wing Zero's cockpit, and took off after him.

* * *

True to his word, Quatre never left the bed. Not when Trowa ran out crying, not when Heero left to chase after him, and not when the door opened an hour after Heero's departure. He knew his fate wasn't up to him anymore. It was all in Wufei's hands. When he surrendered his life to Wufei in exchange for Trowa's he knew he'd have to pay. And the devil had come to collect his due.


Wufei stomped into the room. He saw Quatre where he had left him. He yanked the blonde off the bed and threw him to the floor. "You know, Quatre, I was thinking. And I think that maybe you've outlived your usefulness to me. Maybe it's time for me to move on."


Real fear crept into Quatre's eyes. "But Wufei you promised," he whispered.


Wufei looked down on him. "Yes, I did. If you stayed with me, I wouldn't hurt the others. But, Quatre you've become so boring. And Trowa seems like he'd be such a challenge to break. And if you're good maybe I'll let you live. Would you like that? Getting to watch me make your precious Trowa mine? Maybe I'd even let you join. Yes, it would be enjoyable to watch me make Trowa force himself on you."


Quatre's eyes widened. "No. You can't. You said you'd honor your word."


Wufei sighed. "You're right. I must honor our agreement. It's too bad really, I would have loved to see the look on Trowa's face as he took you."


Then Wufei pulled out his gun, and aimed it at Quatre's heart. "Don't worry, love. This will hurt, but it's how it must be. In death you will forever stand as a tribute to my strength. Say good-bye my Quatre."


Quatre squeezed his eyes shut. He had failed. Now there would be no one to stand between Wufei and the others. But if this was it, then he had to know. He refused to die without knowing. "why?" he asked, barely audible.


Wufei lowered the gun. He was intrigued. "Always with the whys. You know Duo asked that exact same question right before.. well, you know."


Wufei backed up a few steps and scrutinized Quatre's face. Quatre dared to open his eyes, and he saw Wufei staring at him. He also saw that the gun was no longer aimed at him.  


"So why what? Why you, or why do what I did?"


"All of it. Why Wufei?"


The Chinese boy smiled cruelly. "Does there have to be a reason? Maybe I just did it because I enjoy it."


Quatre studied his face, and shook his head. "That may be true. In fact I know it is. But I know you. Or, I thought I did. And you wouldn't have gone through all this unless you had some sort of objective," he murmured.


"Ah, Quatre you're being brave today, and always so insightful. You think you always know just what everyone is thinking or feeling. And you're always trying to make it better. But where is everyone when *you* need help?"


Wufei closed the gap between them, and slammed the gun into the side of Quatre's head. Quatre slumped to the floor. He put a hand up to feel the throbbing spot, and his fingers came back covered in blood. Then he felt the warmth of it as it ran from the gash, down his cheek. "I suppose you'll want to know why I did that, too," Wufei spat out.


Quatre shook his head, the slight movement making the room spin. "Well, that," he said motioning the gun to Quatre's head, "that was to get you to realize that no one gives a fuck about you, or your little intuitions. And that no one is coming to save you. As to the other why's, yes I did have a purpose." He looked at Quatre's prone form thoughtfully. "Would you like to make another deal?"


Quatre was trying to wipe the blood off, or stop the flow. It was running into his eyes, and the shoulder of his shirt was already soaked. What choice did he have? "What's the deal?"


"If you're a good boy, and you don't struggle, then I'll tell you the story. If not, then I'll just beat the shit out of you now."


"Fine." he sighed.


Wufei tucked the gun in the waistband of his pants. He led Quatre over to the desk chair, and sat him in it. Then he left, and returned with a large coil of rope. Quatre sat, while Wufei bound him tightly to the chair. Arms tied to the arm rests, legs spread and tied to the legs. When he was satisfied that the blonde couldn't break free, he retrieved a large hunting knife he had left in the hallway. It was razor sharp, the kind you use to skin an animal with.


Wufei settled on the ground in front of Quatre. He methodically began to cut away Quatre's pants, making sure to never nick the skin. "So where shall I start?" Quatre was too scared to answer. Wufei was about to tell him everything. That could only mean that the Chinese boy wasn't planning on him being around much longer.


"What, no requests?" Wufei seemed almost giddy, like he found the whole situation entirely amusing. "Ok, the beginning then. It started with my father. He taught me to crave strength, and to crush weakness. For as long as I can remember he would beat me. Everyday, no exceptions. Not because I had done anything wrong, but to prove his dominance. He told me I was small, and weak, but that it would make me stronger. Sometimes he would use his fists, other times his belt, or a tree branch."


"Whatever the tactics the message was always the same. He was strong, I was weak. And I would try to fight back, but it was useless. Because he was right, I *was* weak. But I accepted his discipline, and I learned from it. I learned how to use force to control people. How to humiliate them into submission. How to break down their spirit, and turn them into nothing. How to be in complete control."


Quatre was know relieved of his pants and boxers. The cold air, combined with Wufei's monotone voice sent shivers up his spine. Wufei moved up to tear the knife through Quatre's shirt.


"Then there was Meiran. You don't know her, she was my wife. She was always trying to prove that she was stronger than I was. At first I excused her behavior, she was a brainless female, she didn't know better. Until one day, she challenged me to a fight. Me! And she told me I was too weak to fight. So I had to show her who the weak one was."


"And it was then that I learned that there are more ways to control a person than through violence. The control of the mind is far more powerful. That was the first time I had ever raped somebody, but I knew it wouldn't be the last. The shame in her eyes filled me with such might. It was the ultimate control, the ultimate ownership. To forcefully take someone's body! It was the proof of my strength. But she disobeyed me, she ran off to fight in my place. She ruined all the work I had done to prove I was in control. And there's no room for error. So I had to kill her."


Quatre was saddened to find Meiran's story so similar to his own. But he wasn't surprised. Nothing about Wufei could surprise him anymore. Not even the torture and murder of his own wife. After all Quatre knew that was his fate too. Wufei had long since sliced off Quatre's shirt, and had made himself comfortable on the bed.


"Then there was Duo. Ah, sweet little Duo. But he was different from Meiran, just as you are. I punished her because she deserved it. With you two it was another story. I had been watching Maxwell from afar. I was mesmerized by him. He was so beautiful with that braid, and those eyes. And it wasn't long before I was obsessed with him. I had to have him. He was my weakness."


"And I knew that to overcome that weakness I had to destroy him. Break him down until he was nothing, and then he would stop haunting my mind. And it almost worked, until that fool, Yuy, stepped in and ruined everything. All my hard work for nothing. I could have killed them both when I saw them in bed together. But I had other plans. I wanted to kill Yuy instead, if that didn't tame our Duo then what would?"


"But it didn't work out that way. Maxwell sacrificed himself for Yuy, just as you did for Barton. But in the end it made no difference, Yuy is practically dead anyway. And I thought once I was freed of Duo then I was free of weakness. But then you came along, my innocent Quatre. And I felt the weakness all over again. That, and you knew my dirty little secret. So my weakness was doubled. For you had the power to tell the others, the power to take me down, the power to enchant me."


"So I had to make you mine. I had to destroy you too. I had to prove to everyone I was the strong one, I was in control. I had failed with Meiran and Duo. They defeated me. Even though they both died, they did it with courage. But not you my sweet Quatre. You are my saving grace. Of course with you I used different methods. And there was that little threat of Trowa over your head. But who cares what tactics a man uses to rid himself of weakness, so long as he does it?"


"And you were a weakness little one. But no more. Tonight you will finally be worth something. You never had much worth, did you angel? Not worthy of your Father, not worthy of your colony, not even worthy of your Trowa. Now you are worthy of being my redemption. A confirmation of my power."


Quatre was trying to stay conscious to hear Wufei's reasoning for the torture and death of his friend. His hair was matted with blood, and now it slowly dripped onto his bare shoulder. The room seemed to be getting fuzzy. Suddenly Wufei stood up and walked over to him. He ran the flat part of the blade over Quatre's body.


"Such beautiful skin. So creamy, so soft. Of course the bruises make it even more attractive. They're like little marks saying you're mine. And you are mine. But there's something missing." A sudden gleam came to Wufei's eyes, like he had just come up with a great idea. "I think what's missing is an actual symbol to show that you're my property. Maybe I should carve my name into you. Then no one could dispute that you belong to me."


Wufei traced the tip of the knife along Quatre's stomach. Thin ribbons of blood appeared in its wake. Then Wufei sighed. "As much as I'd like to, I'm afraid I can't. That would be *too* obvious. Don't want to tip off the others. It would spoil the fun I have in store for them." Wufei shifted the blade, and cut through the ropes.


Quatre struggled to get up, but the room began to slant and he fell to the floor. And he was hit with an overwhelming desire to live. He didn't want to die here, on the floor like some animal. "Wufei?" he croaked.


"Yes, my little one?"


"please let me go," he whispered.


Wufei looked thoughtful. He examined Quatre's naked frame from head to toe. Then he nodded his head. "Okay, sweet Quatre. You are free. Go now."


Quatre looked at him, disbelief evident on his face. But he didn't dare argue, instead he tried to haul his aching body to the door.


"You're free now little one. Free from me, free from Heero, free from Trowa."


Quatre stopped. //How could I have been so stupid as to trust Wufei? I'll be free, but the others won't be. How could have I been so foolish to think that my body was my own. That if I protected it, or hurt it, it mattered only to me. My body is Wufei's now. If I try to take it back, he'll only find another one.//


Wufei walked over to where Quatre spot on the floor. The Arabian was on his hands and knees, with his head hanging down. "What will it be?"


Quatre closed his eyes. //For you my Trowa.// "I will stay."


"Who says I want you now? Beg me to let you stay."


"Please Wufei, let me stay with you."


Wufei kicked him in the stomach, and Quatre's arms gave out, causing him to fall flat on his face. "Beg me. Tell me how you seduced me, made me weak."


"Please Wufei, please let me stay! I tempted you with my body, I bewitched your mind. I made you want me. It was all my fault, let me stay!"


Wufei kicked him again, this time he heard the satisfying sound of ribs breaking. Blood filled Quatre's mouth, and he was forced to spit it on the floor. Wufei smiled. "Yes, Quatre. You are worthy to be my salvation. You will deliver me from my weakness. What was it that Duo was always ranting about? Something about a lamb. Something from his useless religion. About a lamb. Being led to slaughter. And it came back.. It's makes no difference. You will be my sacrificial lamb."


He grabbed a handful of hair, and snapped Quatre's head up. The Chinese boy pulled, forcing Quatre to his knees. Then he relinquished his hold on it, and Quatre swayed, trying hard to maintain balance. Then Wufei backhanded him, and he slammed the injured side of his head to the floor. Stars exploded, and his vision went dim. He felt Wufei kicking him over and over.


Blood dribbled in a steady stream from the side of his mouth. His body, covered with multi colored bruises was now painted red. Wufei picked him up and threw him onto the bed. "This is where you let Barton touch you. You enjoyed his hands on you. I'd like to fuck you right here, right now, show you the error of your ways, but I can't. Semen is too easy to trace. But I'll live knowing that I was your first, your last, your only."


He picked Quatre up again and threw him into the wall. Quatre tried to put his hands out, but he didn't react fast enough. He smashed into it. He leaned up against it, trying to grasp it with his hands. But he was too tired. He crumpled to the floor, leaving bloody hand prints all over the wall. Wufei came to his side. Quatre just wanted to go to sleep. The dream world was calling for him. It promised happiness, and beauty. And he desperately wanted to go.


"Not yet, my angel."


Wufei pulled Quatre to his knees. Quatre slumped against him. The Chinese boy took the gun from his waistband. He fisted a hunk of hair, and held Quatre's head up. The cherub face was bloody, and bruised, but the ethereal look to it wasn't diminished. He truly looked like a celestial being fallen from the heavens. Wufei clicked off the safety, and cocked the gun. He placed it to Quatre's temple. "Your death will be my preservation." His finger tightened on the trigger.


Then Wufei heard the front door open. He took one look at the boy who would have redeemed him, then let him fall to the floor. Wufei shoved the gun into his pants, and ran to the window. He yanked it open, and pushed himself through. He ran into the night, to blend in with the shadows of the woods.


The bedroom door swung open, and the boy on the other side fell to his knees at the sight. The blood everywhere, the still body on the floor.


"No.."


~~~~~

tbc.